A friend called the other day to see if I could spend time with her that afternoon. She has been going through a rough time and I have made myself physically and emotionally available to her quite regularly. Usually it is my joy to provide support, but this time it felt like a burden. Guiltily, I finally decided to tell her I could not visit and went ahead with my regular plans. Later, she told me that having the afternoon to herself turned out to be exactly what she needed and that she had worked out her problem by herself.
We all have wonderful ways that we can serve in the world, but along with our abilities sometimes comes a sense of obligation to help whenever and wherever we can. The problem arises when we assume the role of deciding what would be best for someone else. How do we know? So, more and more often, I’m remembering to help only when it feels joyful to me (that doesn’t necessarily mean easy!). If helping only feels like a burden and an obligation I try to remind myself of my friend and consider that, possibly, the best way I can help is to not help at all.
Let your spirit soar!
Paula
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