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Archive for the ‘Judgement’ Category

Past or present? #19

I just read an article that reminded me of a conversation I had years ago with my teenage son when he was struggling with his self image. It was right after he had an opportunity to join in a basketball game with a group of boys he had never met before. He said how refreshing it was to play with people who didn’t know him because he could just be himself. When I asked what he meant my son told me that he was growing and changing but that he didn’t think he could succeed in presenting a new image of himself to his current schoolmates because their expectations of him were all tied up in how they perceived him in the past and they wouldn’t be able to really see him as he was now.

 A Course in Miracles says, “When you have learned to look on everyone with no reference at all to the past, either his or yours as you perceived it, you will be able to learn from what you see now. For the past can cast no shadow to darken the present, unless you are afraid of light.”

 Now I find myself wondering how often I use my past experience with someone as a reference point from which to judge them in the present. So the next time I find myself expecting a “past performance” from someone who usually troubles me, I’m going to try leaving a space open in my heart to see their light instead. I certainly won’t throw caution to the wind and put myself in harm’s way but I will give someone the gift of a clean slate; a chance to let their beautiful inner light shine through. Who knows? We might both be pleasantly surprised!

Let your spirit soar!
Paula

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Court in Session (#11)

 

I went to court today to support a friend who’s going through a divorce. As I sat there watching people waiting for a judge to rule on their case, I began thinking that the courthouse is just a big symbol of an even bigger problem in our lives. Of course, none of us like to be judged, but isn’t that what we do every day? For every loving thought we have, how many judgmental ones are there? From small irritations like inclement weather to more important issues such as going to war, it seems that we’re just not happy unless we’re judging someone or something.

But, what if everything that we see “outside” of ourselves is really just a reflection of what is going on “inside” of us? What if it’s our own unhappiness (conscious or not) that causes us to see things the way we do? For example, I remember a time that I was driving to an art class in the snow. It was getting slippery and I kept changing my mind about whether to continue or turn around and go home. Soon there was a motorist driving right next to me on the highway. Although there was plenty of room for him to either keep his distance or get around me, he kept passing me and then falling back, over and over again. It was making me so nervous that I finally found myself screaming at him, ‘WOULD YOU MAKE UP YOUR FLIPPING MIND!!!!! He couldn’t hear me, of course but, when I heard myself, I started to laugh. I realized that the driver was simply mirroring my own indecision! And, how interesting!  As soon as I figured that out, he exited the highway.

So, the next time you find yourself playing judge and jury, you might want to check out who’s actually in the witness stand. 🙂

Let your spirit soar!
Paula

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